Brothers and Sisters Difficult to Get along, Like This How to Overcome it

Why do siblings fight more often and rarely get along? Some just make them scramble or spark debate. Father and Mother until confused how to make them able to play together without fighting. Relax, actually there is a simple reason to understand the relationship and how to overcome it. The relationship of siblings is very important, because it is very influential on the growth of the child's personality. Especially if they spend all day together, because both parents work.

Various Possible Causes

Siblings can be closest friends, but they can also be the opposite. The relationship between siblings is actually not as simple as it seems. This relationship can be influenced by many things such as life events, genetic factors, the treatment of parents, or experiences outside the family. These sibling relationships can be increasingly complex in twins, or if one child has special needs. In addition, these relationships can also get worse if they are often compared. For example, who crawled first, who was smarter, who was accepted in a famous school, or who was smarter in sports. Changing children's needs can also trigger sibling relationships. For example, a child who has just entered school will learn about equality, so that he will feel disturbed if he sees his sister get special treatment. It could also be, an older child will complain if asked to accompany his sister, when he wants to play to a friend's house. In addition, the personality of each child also plays a role in the relationship of siblings. Competition can occur if the personality of the brother is very much different from his sister. Although that does not mean, similar personalities will not trigger competition at all.

Classified as Normal to a Specific Limit

Fighting and competition between brother and sister is normal. It can actually make children learn to resolve conflicts. However, to remember, children learn to resolve conflicts, especially from their parents. Children will learn to handle conflicts well if they see that their parents are not aggressive and still respect each other even when they are involved in conflict. If he sees his parents speak loudly or slam the door when angry, it could be that he will also imitate. If a fight between brother and sister turns into dangerous, for example brother or sister who often hits or mocks, Father and Mother need to take more decisive action. This must be done especially if it causes health or psychological disorders in other family members. If you don't know exactly what to do, parents can consult a child psychologist to find the right solution.

Tips for Brothers and sisters always get along

At the age of one year children can better understand how parents or others treat them. From the age of 1.5 years, children begin to understand the rules at home, including how to interact with relatives. While children aged 3 years, are able to adapt to the different needs of themselves and their siblings. This is why Father and Mother from an early age need to adopt a pattern of nurturing that gives equal space to brother and sister. Here are some tips that parents can do to help siblings get along better:

• Give special attention to each child

If brother and sister spend most of the day together, make time so that they can play individually. For example with neighbors who are the same age. Mothers also need to take time to be with each child. For example, after accompanying your brother to play, remember to make a special moment with Brother too. For example, if Brother likes to read, Mother can spend ten minutes before going to bed to read with him.

• Avoid privileging one of the children

Do not privilege one child, even though in certain conditions one is better than another. It is highly recommended to avoid saying, "Why can't you calm down like your sister?" Sentences like this will only exacerbate the sense of resentment that he may feel to the Brother, also to the Mother.

• Don't force children to share

Sharing is good. But, it is also important to make Little One aware of the concept of ownership and responsible for the things he has. Therefore don't force him to share all things. Leave some items that he can only use on his own, perhaps for health reasons, such as a toothbrush or towel.

• Get used to compromise when children fight

Separate the two children who are fighting so they are calm. Then teach them to compromise and negotiate. Give each child the opportunity to explain each other's point of view. Mother is also advised not to be judgmental. For example, if the problem is that they want to play the same toy, then Mother can try to make a schedule to play alternately.

• Apply the same rules

Establish the same rules for younger siblings and older siblings. For example, TV viewing schedules, no hits, and no damage to objects. If they are old enough, ask them to set penalties independently if they break the rules. For example, the game play time on weekends is reduced by 1 hour if hitting younger or older siblings.

Relationships are not uncommon often encounter conflicts. But, that does not mean they do not love each other. Father and Mother can do the tips above to make brother and sister always get along. Don't forget to compliment if they are being kind and helping each other, yes.